Note From Tongal: “How To Explain Your Freelance Career Confidently" is part of a series of Tongal Community-written blog posts that were originally sourced in the Tongal Blog Open Call Project. Read more Tongal Community-written posts here and then Pitch us a topic you'd like to write about for the Tongal Blog!
---
You don’t have a steady job? (GASP!) There are weeks, or months even, when you may not work? (Side eye) You don’t currently have your next project lined up? (Jaw drop)
I think we’ve all, at some point, felt scrutinized when explaining our (often-inconsistent) job-to-job lifestyle as a freelancer. It can be stressful clarifying what you do as a contract employee. Before attending parties and family gatherings, anxiety sets in at the realization that you'll be asked the dreaded, "What do you do for work?" question by people who clearly can't comprehend anything beyond the nine-to-five lifestyle.
But, here’s the good news: If you take a closer look at what it is you actually do, assess what you've accomplished, and consider why you do it, you can prepare yourself to respond in a calm, cool, and confident manner. And who knows? Maybe you’ll even open up your skeptics’ eyes to the world of 1099 chaos: liberating autonomy, schedule flexibility, and the constant nervous (but mostly excited) anticipation of what’s next…
So, what do you do?
Seriously, what is it that you do? What’s your craft or skill? Is it a one-word answer? Or is it more complicated to explain?
I used to find myself over-explaining at parties until I realized the response, “I’m a writer,” was more than sufficient and completely accepted by most people. No further questions asked. Oh, you mean, you don’t want to hear the three-minute spiel I prepared? Fine! I didn’t want to give it anyway.
However, you should at least have a 15-second spiel prepared, just in case. I’ve found that being able to answer, “What do you do?” as concisely as possible makes you sound confident in your work from the start. Think of it as your elevator pitch and practice it so when the question is posed, you have a response prepared. “I’m a programmer and software developer.” BOOM. Nailed that delivery.
Oh, where do you work?
I once heard a coder say, “Well, I don’t technically work for a company… I freelance so it’s not really steady…” Um, ew. This sounds so uncertain and, honestly, made me anxious for him. He might as well have said, “I’m scared about my future and don’t know when I’m getting paid next.”
Watching someone flounder while speaking about themselves is like watching bad improv—I just want it to end without anyone resorting to a mimed gun. Don’t focus on the fact that the questioner may not understand the appeal of freelancing. Show them the positives of contract work in the way you confidently respond.
Examples:
“I actually work for myself.” (What’s that you say? You’re your own boss? How cool!)
“I work for several different companies who outsource the work I do.” (Oh, you must be quite skilled if your work is in demand by, not just one, but several companies. Congrats!)
The way we word things gives our listeners subconscious cues as to what they should focus on. If you highlight the good stuff, they’ll hear and take away the positives.
What have you done?
Sometimes, especially between jobs, it can be difficult to remember what we’ve accomplished. Sit down and make a list of all your career achievements. Seriously. Do this now. Include projects you’re especially proud of, but also ones that might have been a headache. Every little thing counts. It’s all part of your resume. Each job taught you a new skill, provided a lesson, introduced you to someone you’re still friends with, or simply enabled you to pay bills.
Keep your list in a place where you’ll see it regularly and continue adding to it. Creatives (especially those who are bold enough to be freelancers) tend to have a strong work ethic and high standards. This is great, except for the fact that we’re often extremely hard on ourselves. We need reminders of our achievements. Let me repeat that again: We need to be reminded of our achievements. It helps us stay positive and keeps things in perspective.
My friend once described a dinner party with her husband’s friends and wives as “one of the most mentally debilitating experiences” of her life. They were all doctors, lawyers, and Fortune 500 execs. She’s a comedian. It was difficult for them to understand her career path and they asked a lot of questions she wasn’t prepared to answer. Now, she makes sure to keep a few of the achievements from her list in mind so she can talk about them as examples of what she does when people ask.
What are you working on now/next?
When you’re job-to-job, it’s easy to stress over where your next paycheck is coming from, which means some nosey person asking a bunch of questions only serves as an additional reminder of the unstable nature of freelance work. Try to remember that people don’t intend to be rude or crush your spirits with these sorts of questions. They’re just attempting to understand what you do.
If you’re between jobs, that doesn’t mean you can’t answer this question confidently. When someone isn’t paying you to do a job, use that time to work on your own projects. Take a class, finish that screenplay, or revamp your website/resume. You’re your own boss, after all. Don’t sleep on the job. If someone else hasn’t assigned you something to do, give yourself a project. You should always have an answer to this question.
There was a time I worked three freelance jobs simultaneously for several months. Once they were complete, I loved telling people: “Oh, I’m not looking for work right now. I’m taking a month off to film a pilot I co-wrote and am producing.” Work is work. Doesn’t matter who assigns it. I felt much prouder talking about my pilot rather than discussing the product descriptions I’d written for a fashion company. It’s all perspective.
And you’re able to support yourself doing that?
My opinion is that this isn’t anyone’s business, but if you want to respond, I suggest keeping it simple. Money is a touchy subject and everyone’s living requirements are different. I like using an example of something my freelance career enabled me to do as a way to segue out of the topic. “Yes, I was actually able to take a road trip this past summer.” And then fill their ears with details about the trip!
“Oh, I could never do that. It’s too unstable.”
Said a woman I was talking to at a social gathering. Sometimes I feel statements like this are meant to commend me and, other times, I think they’re just backhanded compliments. When it’s the former, I’ll say things like, “Oh, sure you could, if you wanted to!”
It was this particular woman’s tone that made me sure it was a backhanded compliment. In these instances, I like responding in a way that lifts me up, but also has a little bite:
“Understandable. It’s not for everyone. You really have to be a hard worker with a lot of self-discipline.”
“That’s fair. Personally, I couldn’t sit at a desk five days a week. That would be torture.”
“Well, jobs aren’t as stable as they used to be. I have several friends who were laid off from jobs they thought were secure.”
If someone isn’t supportive of your freelance lifestyle, chances are they either don’t understand it or they’re jealous of it. I don’t like to be rude, but I do like to respectfully put rude people in their place.
So. Why do you freelance?
In my experience, the things I have felt the most nervous sharing because they seemed “unstable” or unrelatable (i.e. living in a tiny overpriced apartment while working two full-time contract jobs so I could take acting classes) are the things people were most receptive to and intrigued by. Those were the times people responded with, “OMG! You’re living the dream!” or “How exciting! I want to live vicariously through you!” These comments all came from people with houses and “stable” jobs—living a “traditional” life. Moral of the story: the grass is always greener.
But, as you know, freelancing is hard work. It often feels unstable and there are definitely slow times. However, it also affords us a number of freedoms and is rewarding in many ways. Knowing your “why” puts everything in perspective and makes it all worthwhile.
Your reason for freelancing may even change as life takes you on its journey. I’ve always loved being my own boss and having the freedom to work when I want. That inspires me to keep going and stay positive in between gigs. But, my “why” shifted recently after my father unexpectedly passed away. I returned to Chicago for a month to spend time with my mom while continuing to work remotely on a contract job. That is a perfect example of why I freelance.
If you’re passionate about what you do and why you do it, it’s easier to speak confidently about it and people will hear that and be receptive to it. So, don’t forget why you chose this career path and keep your chin up as you continue down it—you’re doing great.
